I’M A RECLUSE…………SUE ME!

I am a chronic recluse and I have been officially given a prescription, after careful observation, of a hang-out with the opposite sex (I see you rolling your eyes oh!).

I know some of you find it hard to believe I’m a recluse, that’s not a problem really; all you have to do is try, if you can, to remember the last time I hung out with you. Now, my hang-outs, no matter how far in-between, are always memorable so if you are still trying to remember, the answer is probably never. Still don’t think it’s chronic???

Anyways, I’m too bloody picky for my own good so let’s just toss the opposite sex hang-out out the window, for now.( We may have to go get it back later…

Now, the stupid versions of me still wait around for no-guy to pick up their bills whenever they want a treat. I am not an all-over-the-place babe so no need fooling myself.

Last Friday right, I walked into an eatery to get myself ‘treats’ for a late Friday movie (what can a girl like me do na???). Nyways, on my way in, I had seen some really pleasant looking guys but no one walked up to me.

As I moved closer to the counter, an old neighbour popped out of nowhere and was saying how tickled he was to see me (Bla! Bla!! Bla!!!). I remained polite and walked towards the counter, thinking he would come along. For where! The guy just disappeared into thin air (no surprise there anyway, the guy broke gaan!)

I got my order and made my way past the doorman who greeted me a little too much (unfortunately, I don pocket the change already. No show!)

“Psssssssssssssssssssss!” a cat called.

I glanced backwards for a mono-second and realised one of the pleasant looking guys had called. I simply ignored him and kept walking towards the herd of bike men near the gate.

Why didn’t I answer?

No. 1: he really could have called me before I went in to buy stuff but he didn’t (my honest truth, I wouldn’t have asked him to pay my bill if he had). This means he is most likely cheap. No thanks!

No. 2: he cat-called?! The guy obviously has no respect for ladies cos I’m sure I didn’t look anything less.

Never mind, another reclusive Friday night awaited me and………I WASED GONNA LOVE YIT! (……and you can roll ya yiz all ya want, I don kia!)s