Thursday, November 07, 2013

Circling Cycles

I stand amid the habitual buzz and bustle
Failed by the remarkable strength which always carries me along with the throng
Drowned by the intensity of my pursuits and the weight of my duties
Alone in a crowd too absorbed in their cares to perceive

Transiting into a phase of weariness
The kind that makes being strong Herculean
And the possibilities of vulnerability, enticing
Though at the peril of susceptibility to sheeply preys

Propriety restricts my impulses to scream
The resolve which I currently detest refrain me from letting loose the waterworks
Today, I withdraw my shoulder and palm of comfort from my burdeners
As I scurry off in search of that which will serve me

Albeit, vulnerability be attractive
With a long to, without restraint, bare my heart to the unjudging
And at once, at loss as to whom it might be
As these who were, are losing ground hold.
Without doubt, there are those with honest hearts and profound intentions
Nonetheless, I do not will to reveal
For fear of being distinguished as that which I currently desire to be...

So unclear, uncertain and uncommitted
I tow around on me the weight of my pent-up sufferings
Frustrated by the vividity of unshed concerns
Who in themselves are of no State import
Yet, possess a sensitivity that makes revelation a work of care

The eventuality of this phase is the surety that my detested strength will return
At a calculated moment of undeniable acceptance, complete with open embrace
Accompanied by a duty to be her I used to be
And a recall to pended obligations
With irritation that is self-directed
I re-receive the unattended 
Then reflect on the carousel that has become me.